Friday, November 6, 2009

I wish I had sent my Surrogate
to see Surrogates

I think this fall has been the leading year for big promise, little payoff. What I assume is the end of the strike pictures is here (or was here at the end of last month). Hey, afraid of germs? Send out your surrogate (or avatar this holiday season). Don't want to get hit by a pickup truck? Me neither. And this is coming from a guy who has been hit by seven different pickups on nine different occasions. Send out your surrogate. Do you hate walking? Who doesn't. Spend a lot of money on a surrogate.

So, this movie is about robots who interact in the world while you stay home. What could have been an interesting tale of the soul, friendship and life really is a by the numbers who done it. And it has Ving Rhames looking like Delroy Lindo. Think about that for a minute.

I went to see this after being sick and needing to get out of the house for 82 minutes. I wish I had taken enough cough syrup to make this an enjoyable fever dream. It was not. How can this be in the theaters still and The Informant! is already gone. Damnit.

Anyways, it might be time for Bruno to start doing his indie films and serious roles instead of action. Remember Collateral Damage and End of Days? Yeah, these are Bruce Willis' final bow into action. Please. Hopefully. Time to do more good meaty adult old man roles. Let's consult the list.

Did you enjoy it?
Not really.

Would you see it in theaters again?
Hells no.

Would you rent it?

Would you buy it?
Are you crazy?

Would you watch it if you saw it was on TV?


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