Hey Summer, Where Ya B'

As I sit watching John Rambo decimate all Burmese war criminals in his path (on Showtime HD, where the red blood really splatters well) at Krull Nugget Headquarters, MGM, I think about all the free movies that have come our way this summer. In a couple week's we'll do the summer round up.

But to be fair, we might as well wait until a contender for summer best comes out (hint: new Tarantino) and what will probably one of the worst (hint: sequel to a remake that had 8 entries before being taken over by a heavy metal front man).

I'm not sure what is in store this fall except for the occasional Video Pizza Party. I've got a project at work that I've been on since March. That rolls out in two weeks. I'm moving in October. The Room is coming back to town. So it might be quiet here at the old 'nug, but rest assured, when there are things to talk about, we'll be here. (OMG Rambo just mutilated a truck of small dudes with a giant machine gun).

We've had TV round up for the decade. Decade of music is coming soon. Movies from the past 10 will wait until it is time to open our presents. And who knows what hilarity will spring up in between.

But until then, here's a video that really sums up summer in Chicago...

Please to enjoy.

YouTube Version

Living in the Land of the Lost

My recollection of the original series Land of the Lost was mostly contained to "ugh, cartoons are over and now this stupid show is on". Even as a kid I seem to remember just how terrible it was. Which, as I have mentioned previously on this blog, makes it one of the perfect targets for a remake. There is plenty of room to improve from the source material.

The new movie starring Will Ferrell, Danny McBride, Anna Friel and Jorma Taccone is very funny. They do well with some outrageous humor. This is like the Dark Knight of PG-13 comedies. There is the one mouthed F bomb. The humor is definitely not for kids that the original show was targeted.

What some critics have been probably complaining about (haven't read any reviews but heard they were pretty bad) is that the movie is weird. Just like the TV show, there is a lot of strange things going on. Its all over the place. But if you've seen one second of the TV show you know that was the case then too.

They stay faithful to the essence of the show. Will and Holly are now grown ups, not kids. Chaka is a jerk hornball. But other than that, you get what you got. I noticed in the theatre that Mark and I were the loudest laughers (I beat everyone except my papa in the loud laugh dept). There was a lot of quiet. To be fair there weren't a lot of people there either. It was a matinee in the middle of the week. We were the first people to sit down and only a few couples came in after us.

Did you enjoy it?
Yes.

Would you see it in theaters again?
No.

Would you rent it?
Yes.

Would you buy it?
Possibly. There would have to be proof of an improv reel with Danny and Will going back and forth.

Would you watch it if you saw it was on TV?
As long as there weren't any cartoons on.

Star Trek 11

Summer is here. From the poster above you see that this, like Harry Potter, was supposed to be a Christmas holiday release. When the strike happened some things were moved back to fill their schedule. Regardless, Star Trek reboot / sequel is here. Its a sequel because it really takes place after all the shows and movies that have come before. But as the case with some of the episodes and part IV, we've got to deal with time travel. Boy does it work. I'm a casual fan of the Star Trek world. I watched the Next Generation. I saw the original cast movies in theatres.

I would compare this to the Friday the 13th remake remodel. They take the best stuff and make it something fresh and new. If you're not a fan of the show / series, you still have a good chance of loving this movie. If you're a hard ass STtOS fan you really can't complain because they stay true to the show's canon. I think this summer is going to have a long way to go to top this movie. 

That's not to say it doesn't have its flaws. First off, WTF is going on with all lense flares. Yeah, I get it, you didn't shoot in space, its special effects. That means you had to go above the usual stuff to add the flares. Cut it out. 

The second issue is what we'll just call "Bourne Syndrome". Fast quick cuts to mask the action. Batman Begins, Quantum of Solace, etc.  

Did you enjoy it?

Yes.

Would you see it in theaters again?

Yes.

Would you rent it?

Yes.

Would you buy it?

Possibly. I have 10 movies ahead of it to purchase if I want to be complete (plus every episode of every show / season).

Would you watch it if you saw it was on TV?

Yes.

Friday the 13th (part 12)

The popular trend of remaking old films continues with F13th. It does things right, like making Jason alive again, not an unkillable zombie. There is a good amount of sweet sweet nudity. Inventive kills but plenty of room for sequel improvements. When a movie hits its twelfth you usually ask why. But as is the case with the new James Bond franchise, some times it just makes sense to start over.

If you're a fan of the series or a fan of horror you will definitely enjoy it.

Did you enjoy it?

Yes. Hell Yes.

Would you see it in theaters again?
If it was a midnight movie, sure.

Would you rent it?
Yes.

Would you buy it?
I have 11 others ahead of it to buy, but if I had the set I would for sure.

Would you watch it if you saw it was on TV?

Yes.

My Bloody Valentine 3-D (with special guest Tom Adkins)

My Bloody Valentine is a remake of the original horror classic (which I have not seen). This was a AICN free screening. Tom Adkins was there for a post film Q&A. I agree with Devin Faraci of Chud.com that if you're going to remake a movie, why not remake a bad one. I know that the Hollywood Machine just wants name recognition and branding. This movie is what I would consider one that could fall into that category. Again, I haven't seen the original (it's on my netflix queue), but I don't have any friends that have seen the original either.

The movie supposedly uses the opening credits to go over the original film's plotline. Sounds like a good way to start. Then we get into it. Its a slasher mystery. You are lead to believe that anyone and everyone could be the killer. When you find out who it is, they have to flashback to all the scenes shown earlier in the movie. The reason that they do it is because the killer is unbelievable. It is layed out that you rule them out and low & behold they actually are the killer.

Easily a forgettable slasher film. Currently there are commericals for it on DVD and Blu Ray and they call it MBV 3D which begs the question "does each DVD come with 3D glasses?" Or is it simply the case of the title of the movie including the term 3D. I'm not buying a copy to find out.

On to Tom Adkins. He of Night of the Creeps / Halloween 3 / The Fog. He came in and was a super nice guy. He answered every fan's question. Talked about how much he loved Fred Dekker (who doesn't). Said he wasn't friendly with John Carpenter (called him an odd bird). It was cool to hear him talk candidly.

Back to the movie:

Did you enjoy it?
Yes. Decent kills with pickaxe in 3D. Saw my first nude girl running for her life in 3D.

Would you see it in theaters again?
No. Free was plenty.

Would you rent it?

No.

Would you buy it?

No. But someone, please do so we know if it comes with 3D glasses.

Would you watch it if you saw it was on TV?

Eh. Maybe to fall asleep to.